These Are My Confessions

So, I guess I should tell my side of the story so no one freaks out and thinks Alex's post is a real confession. Yes, it's true we've been trying to eat healthier for the most part but we're far from perfect.

When Alex and I decided we wanted to start eating healthier, we went into it together because we knew that neither one of us was strong enough to do it on our own. So we made a sort of pact to always look out for the other, especially when the temptations were strongest. You know, sort of how missionaries do. Marriages work the same way. I guess if anyone knew how we'd been eating for the last couple of years, they'd know just how unhealthy our diet really was. But we were both in denial then, and probably would have said we were just fine.

A truth about health that I've learned recently is this: You don't know that you're not healthy until you get healthy. And in this country, I believe many are under the impression that what you eat doesn't matter as long as you exercise. I've come to realize that it matters more what eat when you do. Actually, I think it does matter all the time, but far be it from me to judge anyone on this matter since I myself will probably struggle with food craving for the rest of my life.

Anyone who's known me in the past, knows what a fitness guru I used to be. I mean, I used to do regular morning workouts before attending 3-5 hours of physical dance classes (and that didn't include the hours of kinesiology, somatics and all other classes that required papers and asessments of sorts) per day and still found time to teach hip-hop, pilates, yoga and children's ballet classes at night. I must have been crazy. I don't know how I managed then because I definitely wasn't eating as well as I am today. I remember getting sick a lot and pushing through it.

I guess somewhere between getting married and having two kids, I've somewhat let that go. But in the past I will admit I struggled with mild eating disorders of which I don't care to detail much. All I know is that these days, I want to regain my health the right way. The way I lived when I was a single college student was terribly unbalanced. The way I was living after getting married wasn't all that much better. It's true that if you don't find a good habit to replace the old bad one, that you'll just replace it with another bad one. In essence, I feel that's what I did.

That said, we've just both come to an awareness that eating Raw and Vegan as much as possible is actually an immune strengthener, cleanser and fights disease better than any prescription or over-the-counter drug on the market. We've also tried hard to allow the scriptures to guide us so as not to let this particular gospel hobby consume our lives so much that we become extremists about it. Our main guide is D&C 89 as the revelation does address the fact that even though the "flesh of beasts," is "ordained for the use of man," that it is in fact, "pleasing unto him that they should not be used," with the exception of winter, cold and/or famine. This can be found in verses 12-13. I've slightly paraphrased. Since this is just our family blog, I don't find it's necessary to cite sources formally. Anyways, because of these scriptures, we've toyed with the idea of whether we should have a traditional thanksgiving dinner or not since technically we don't live in snow right now and even though our economy is in trouble, we aren't quite living in a famine. At least not yet. But that is another long story I won't go into right now.

Our main reason for wanting to eat more Raw and Vegan actually began with our son. Since we've made this transition, we've noticed huge improvements in Orion's strength, energy and overall health. His reoccuring skin rashes have completely faded and where he normally gets flare-ups, his skin has healed quite nicely. His frequent wheezing and sneezing has all stopped. We've all had slip-ups but because we try to support one another, we don't wallow in our guilt as tends to happen with most people who attempt to diet with the latest fads. Of this, I myself am guilty.

Our addictions to food are so different. Alex craves the more meaty things. I crave for sugary, refined carbs. Emphasis on sugar. Oh and let's not forget chocolate. It's not that we don't allow these things into our lives anymore, but we've basically tried to eliminate buying them when grocery shopping. So we don't have them regularly, but on occasion we have splurged. In any case, our eating habits are so much better than what they used to be.

So I've rambled long enough. I like writing I guess. But back to the main story:

Even though we've both enjoyed higher energy levels and better overall feelings of wellness, we've had our moments. These last couple of weeks we'd been completely Vegan and almost about 60% Raw, or so I thought. A couple days ago, I went to the store with Alex and was ever so tempted to indulge in those melt-in-your-mouth Lindt Chocolate Truffles. With Alex's persuasive rhetoric, I put a bag of milk-chocolate truffles back on the shelf and tried to convince myself that I was being wise for "taming my flesh."

Fast forward a few days: I was havin' a pretty good day yesterday and was wanting to take the kids for a stroll to this little clothing store near our house to buy a new shirt or earrings or something. Naturally I check our account online to see if we can afford to spend a few bucks on something not deemed a necessity. Since the birth of our little girl, Alex had pretty much taken over the managing of money. We used to do it together, but I was finding it difficult to stay on top of. The point is, I don't think Alex thought that I ever checked our balances online anymore. Because I hadn't in a while, he had good reason to think that. So on this particular day, I check the account and I didn't have to scroll down far before I saw maybe 3 purchases with the words In-N-Out right next them. Hmmmm. I know I didn't go to there. I was at home without a vehicle for the past few weeks. And there was no way that I was going to believe that my cute husband was going there just for lettuce, onions and tomato on a bun. He normally gets veggie sandwiches from Subway where they have more veggies to use.

Shortly after figuring it all out, he gives me a call to say he's headed to lunch. He usually calls while he's not knocking doors, so I expected as much. I reassure to him, "Something healthy right?" He says, "Of course! Why wouldn't I?" So I ask slowly, "Not In-N-Out right?" At this point, there is a hesitant pause followed by, "No," an even shorter pause, "Why?" And then I proceeded to tell him about my discovery. I don't think I would be exaggerating if I said he sounded like a 2-year-old who'd just gotten caught with his hand in the cookie jar. The apprehensive chuckle said it all.

I wasn't mad. I guess what made it so funny was that here I was at home, actually struggling with my own sugar and chocolate cravings, wondering all the while why I couldn't be as strong as my husband. He even finds ways to coax me out of splurging on something I know I won't feel good about later. That's a good salesman for ya.

His excuse: "If you knew I was splurging, you'd want to do it too and I didn't want you to have a reason to. I was trying to be your strength."

My answer: "But you were cheating without me!"

I mean, we actually discussed going there once all together as a family. But he was the one to talk me out of that one too, all so he could go and indulge in it by himself. And not just once mind you.

Me: "It's like you were cheating on me with beef and cheese."

Alex: "Well, atleast you were good for a long time."

I guess I can't argue with that. Even though he went behind my back, he still put up a great facade for self-discipline. I guess there are worst things to be addicted to. I'm just grateful my husband's biggest problems are burgers. His love affair with In-N-Out Double Doubles aren't enough to keep me away. You should have seen the expression on his face though when he got home to face his wife. It was the biggest Huntington grin with the brightest flushed cheeks I'd ever seen on him. I know his efforts. I know he's human. I love him anyways. Hun, the only thing you should feel sorry for is not taking me with you. :O)